As American as Apple Pie and Motherhood

We don't have apple pie but we have plenty of stuff to honor Motherhood (a great American brand?) at Lanikai Bath and Body, our shop in Kailua, with Hawaii's largest collection of bath and body goodness and luxury.

Lanikai Bath and Body is also online at http://www.lanikiabathandbody.com/ and you can order by next Tuesday May 12 to guarantee Mother's Day delivery. Three year old Lanikai Bath and Body is fast becoming one of Hawai'i's favorite brands ...

We're offering 20% off in-store and online this weekend, Saturday May 2 and Sunday May 3. Online code is LANIKAI

We don't often talk about our own built-from-the-ground brand but for Mother's Day you ought to know about it. Your Mom, your kids's Mom, your Grandmothers and eve your Mother-in-Law will love you for it.

Thanks, Gloria and Brook

Burger "King" Sponge Bob Creepiest Effort Yet

The new Burger King commercial for kids meals purchased with one adult meal is the company's creepiest effort yet.

This one pairs the creepy King with Sponge Bob Square pants and a bunch of dancing women with boxes in their pants. "I like square butts and I can't lie," sings the king.

Just exactly what is Burger King's (the company's) brand promise: "our food is as revolting as our commercials?" It's like their ad agency is trying to get fired.

If you haven't seen it yet, don't watch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5X4TSbGreA&feature=related

More Stupid Bank Tricks

Because I was depositing some Lanikai Bath and Body deposits in the overnight (24 hour) deposit "lock box" I also put in BSG and Lanikai FICA payments for the next day and an envelope for the Bank CEO.

We got a phone call from the bank admonishing that we couldn't do this --- and in fact, they

routed the FICA payment back to the Kailua branch instead of depositing it in the Bank thereby making my FICA payment one day late instead of on time or early.

Amazing flexibility, this Bank of Hawaii.

Even better customer service! That's my bank!

Which is worse: Tainted Meat or a Spit Sandwich?

Poor Dominos --a couple of jerks who worked at some Dominos somewhere video taped themselves doing hideous things to the food and posted it on you tube. According to Headline News(HLN), Dominos fired them, is now looking for them to have them arrested, and may file a civil lawsuit (if they are minors can they get their parents?).

So we've been discussing around here, which is worse for a brand -- tainted meat or spit sandwiches. And we have decided that spit sandwiches are infinitely, infintely worse. So often, we say the people make the brand --- and unmake it evidently.

It's a picture we don't want to see, but unfortunately we did -- on HLN --- and close to 500 people viewed it on the web before it got taken down. Let's watch how Dominos handles this
we hope its an opportunity for them.

Stupid Bank Tricks: Bank of Hawaii

As our readers may or may not know, The Brand Strategy Group specializes in building strong brands. We also specializing in recognizing weak or declining banks.

Until recently, Bank of Hawaii had been on our list of declining brands (weak brand reality, strong brand perception) but as far as our perception goes, it has moved to weak brand status (weak brand perception, weak brand reality).

They have been all over television telling us how MSN money judged them a safe bank. Well, here is how they do it: call them the fee finders. For a year or so I have noted that when I pay with a check that is processed electronically, they charge a two dollar fee. That is they charge me for work they don't have to do (process the check themselves).

The other day I noticed a fee for failure to use direct deposit: $1.00. As a small business for which cash flow is a periodic problem, we cannot have direct deposit because we don't always have the money at pay time. On top of that the teller had to determine that it was my paycheck --- or someone at the bank did -- in order to levy that fee. As it turns out, it was not a paycheck but a distribution we were taking.

I have six separate accounts with Bank of Hawaii -- you think they might connect this and waive these stupid only-for-the-purpose-of-raising-money fees. Maybe I should just move my money.

At any rate, these experiences don't help the Bank of Hawaii's brand which seems at best, mercenary and at worst ignorant. Don't get me started on the generic FIA card services that they hide their "bank of Hawaii "credit cards in front of.

Pictured here: the person behind the fees?

YouTube Symphony Orchestra

Will be performing at Carnegie Hall on April 15 ---

The global YouTube community and a judging panel containing members of the world's most renowned orchestras have selected over 90 talented musicians to be part of the YouTube Symphony Orchestra.

Together, these professional and amateur musicians play 26 different instruments and come from 30+ countries and territories on six continents.

They are meeting in NYC in a collaborative summit for classical music before their performance.

Visit the YouTube Symphony Orchestra Channel: http://www.youtube.com/symphony

This Just In from The Daily Green

Payless is introducing a line of green shoes this month:

Lucky for us, Payless is going to make these shoes as inexpensive as their other lines -- none of the Zoe and Zac (green) line will be more than $30 a pair.None other than "Eco Chick Summer Rayne Oakes" (bdigital's comment: Who is this "eco chick?") was at the Payless event to answer my questions -- she's the brand's sustainability strategist for the new line, which will debut in April of 2009. "They have organic cotton bodies, the dyes are heavy-metal free, and all the metal details are nickel-free," she said of the printed ballet flats, sneakers, flip-flops and espadrilles in the collection. Even the elastic band on one style is made from recycled PET. We also discussed adhesives, the material that makes up the foot beds and the soles, and without getting into all the chemistry specifics, I'll just say that Summer and Payless covered a lot of the sustainability bases for the very first collection in their green line.

"We want to do a better job, as corporate citizens," said Mardi Larson, a spokesperson for Payless I met at the event. And when I told her about my concerns about the 'ghettoization of green' -- that companies would make a green line to cater to the people that cared, leaving the rest of the public with the same old (Earth-disresepecting) stuff, she explained that what the company learns from the green shoe line will eventually be incorporated into all of their Payless products. "We want to democratize green," said Mardi.

Surprise: FOX can be even worse than I thought

Kal Penn, best known as Kumar from Harold and Kumar, and for his role as one of House's benighted subjects on the eponymously named television show has died in his role as Dr. Kutner, committing suicide.

The end of the show, after showing all of Kutner's friends working out their agnst, FOX takes the appalling step of creating a memorial for Kutner and asking people to comment: www.fox.com/kutner

This show is beginning to seem too much like tryouts for the Stockholm syndrome, and after so many comedies and dramas who dedicated their shows to real live souls who have passed on, this fake memorial smacks of FOX will do anything...

They even posted a fake obit from the fake Mercer County Courier (for those of you with brains like Kal Penn -- he quit the show to do something that matters, signing on a arts liason for the White House). At least some people know Celebrity isn't Everything.

Mercer County Courier April 7, 2009

Dr. Lawrence Kutner died on Thursday, April 2nd from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. He was 33 years old."Dr. Kutner was a hard working, young doctor with a kind, unassuming, gentle manner. He will be missed by all of us", said Dr. Lisa Cuddy, Dean of Medicine at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, where Dr. Kutner worked.Dr. Kutner was born in Freemont, California. Tragedy marred his early life as he lost his parents, Karamchand and Niki Baidwan, who were shot during an armed robbery. After a couple of years in foster care, Julia and Richard Kutner adopted Lawrence. He showed great promise in high school, winning a Westinghouse Science award for an experiment involving dark matter. His adoptive parents mused that he showed a freethinking, inventive streak from a young age.Viewers are asked to leave their message for Dr. Kutner.

DON'T YOU DARE POST A COMMENT (on the memorial site).

Jack's Volley Against Burger Shots

A new Jack-in-the-box commercial features little tiny cattle being herded by little people on horses. One line says "the look like schnauzers ... but they're cattle."

Instead of leggy girls who are over the moon about the tiny little burger shots, Jack went over the top to promote his mini sirloins, even giving the little people singing the song voices that sound like the Chipmunks.

This last Jack commercial seems more like the freakish King commercials, and it's hard to imagine they haven't offended the little people of the world.

Beyond that, if you go on http://www.jackinthebox.com/ now you can get a coupon for the mini sirloins that come from tiny cattle herded by little people on very small ponys.